After 18 to 24 months of trying, I knew that we were heading down the road towards IVF.

I never for one moment thought it was going to be THE answer, but I was hoping it would give us AN answer and maybe even a baby.

In the UK a round of IVF is something the NHS funds, as long as neither partner has a child of their own. So the prospect of doing IVF was okay with me, and I was even telling my American family and friends we’ll get funding- it’s all right, we’re not going to be financially ruined by it. So when I went to my final gynaecologist appointment (3 years down the line) and got told the next step was IVF, I was prepared.

But when he said, “but unfortunately you’ve just moved to one of the three districts in the United Kingdom that doesn't fund IVF.” I burst into tears. I tried to control my emotions as I walked out of the office straight into the toilet and cried harder than I had ever before!

There are moments in a journey that you will never forget- this is one.

Some of you will totally understand my emotions; some of you will think that crying over money is lame- either way, that’s what happened. I only cried like that two more times in my life- once right before we did the first round of IVF and once after it failed. The NHS clinic that we used (and personally paid for) for our first IVF (which was an epic fail) said there was nothing they/we could do to improve our chances & embryo quality.

In the letter we got a few weeks later it stated: "They are keen to consider a further attempt, but are aware that the overall chances of an ongoing pregnancy is lower than average given our findings during the cycle and they do you appreciate that the treatment itself does provide a lot of information about the underlining quality of the eggs within the ovaries. There is nothing that we can do to further enhance the situation…........." .

I can honestly say, if we were funded for three IVFs (heck, even 1) I wouldn’t have had the motivation to take control of my fertility and make all the BIG diet & lifestyles I needed to make.

There’s nothing like the potential of losing £10s of £1,000s & being pumped full of drugs to stay committed to a goal.

Even though we have an IVF baby, IVF wasn’t the answer to our infertility. For us, IVF on its own would have NEVER worked. We were sent down the wrong path, as most (I believe) are. But I’m just someone with opinions. Professor Robert Winston the Godfather of IVF and has stated that Infertility is a symptom of disease & there are at least a hundred different causes for infertility. He’s stated IVF is being missed used and many other factors should be looked at before a couple is sent to use IVF.

Like I said before. We were sent straight to IVF after all the "usually" fertility test was done, if we had 3 free rounds on the NHS, they would have totally been a waste of taxpayers money.

IVF (alone) wasn't going to ever give us a baby. For us, if just a little more time & effort was made in finding the root cause of my infertility, we would have saved tens of thousands, time & a lot of heartache. ⁣

🍍 #beyourownhero #infertility #ttc #ivf

Positive Thoughts, Positive Me


📺 Subscribe over on YouTube |

🎙 Subscribe to The Infertile Diagnosis Podcast over on your favourite podcast platform:

+Apple Podcast

+ Google Play


Get to know Monica at Mindful ME + IG @positive_fertility + Facebook

🌺 SIX-WEEK Fertility Reconnect Course |

📝 Try before you buy the Baby & Me Journal |

💌 FREE Mindful Membership: Group Support, Exclusive Videos & Monthly Emails with all my top tips on how to survive & thrive |

🥑 FREE 2 Week Fertility Meal Plan |


Anything written or said about health and diet are our opinions, that we have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for us, may not work for you. We are not doctors, nutritionists or dieticians and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Any product recommendations are based on what we used during our infertility journies or wished we had.

This page contains affiliate links

24 views0 comments